A knock from the past
I dont really plan these memory trips, sometimes they just land on me - totally unplanned and as sudden as a knock on the door. And when you open the door, there is that piece of virgin memory standing in front of you.
It was like that when I got a photo of Somadi("DIDI") from Ruma.
In daily life, I dont remember her everyday. She is not part of my life. The photo was a memory labelled several decades back - a flash from the time when I did not know what to do in life, am I good at geography, am I good at maths - should I study geography, should I become a mathematician. Life unexplored, untouched.
In the midst of that uncertainty was the certain thing, I idolised this lady - looking back it is so difficult for me to reason why, was it because Ruma was so much a part of my life and I loved her as completely as I knew love then? Or is it Didi's personality and her constant encouragement for every success I attained - time has washed away the nuances.
So I did what she did and which sort of matched my strongholds....my future was shaped by her at that point in time.
So many years have gone by, yet as soon as I saw that photo I did not feel it necessary to stop the tears that flowed spontaneously, the feelings that wrecked through me. I guess this is as pure as love can get - you dont feel because of "anything", you just feel.
posted by Tuya @ 19:11
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